Some Kind of Newness

We are still at Loyola Memorial Chapels. We move Mama to Pangasinan early tomorrow morning. Wehave announced that and so this is considered the last night for viewing her remains. At midnight, the place is still full of people.

Some funny things that happened here. First is that, well the noise level is so high, it's echoing. People are discussing everything but death.. Laughter is in the air. Even we are laughing.

Tradition would say a wake should be solemn and people should be prayerful. Tradition says a lot of things that should not be done during and after the wke and the funeral. Some of them may have been born out of coincidence but most of them were crafted based o fear.

But really tradition is not static and it can be changed. We do crete new traditions everyday. Clinging to old practices shows the same fear we face when we dread death itself; the fear of the unknown.

So, can we take a bath while we are having a wake for a family member? Yes, we did although not at the site of the wake even if there was a shower stall there. It's simply not convenient.

Can we clean the place where the dead lies? Sure, the funeral home swept and mopped the floor everyday.

Should we not meet guests and walk them to the door? That's just being polite.

These then are the other reasons for starting traditions; positivity.

Small vrs Big

I am alone again where my mom's remains i right now.  My sister has to go and work on some papers for the interment, and also get some supplies. My brother is still on his way home from abroad.

If we were a bigger family, there would be more people working on stuff. We would not be so tired at the end of the day. No guests would be ignored which was what happened earlier. I had two sets of guests but I can't talk to all of them at the same time because they have different interests

On the other hand, some things are simpler with fewer siblings Decisions can be made faster as there are fewer opinions to consider We easily agreed on final arrangements.

In bigger families too, they wait for everybody before things can be finalized. Is everybody coming home for the burial? Who will be in charge of what? How will everybody be transported,

In our case, division of labor is simple, /Arrangements were decided on quickly, Aside from being small in size, I guess our heads were in the right paces, We did not let emotion get the better of us,

Not yet anyway.

Being At A Wake

For someone bordering on necrophobia, this is really a challenge for me.

I am at my mother's wake in the middle of a memorial park. The worst of it is that I might have to stay here aone tonight.

Good God, I can't even look down into the coffin.

Let me describe the place. The coffin is the first thing you will see when you enter the door. The benches and the comfort room are further into the small room which is about30 square meters I think.

There is a loft where the family could rest. My problem with this is that the loft is above the benches. Looking over th short wall, you see the whole coffin

So I won't look down.